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BDSM Dating: Safe Web Platforms to Dominate and Submit

BookofSex
9.7
/10
BookofSex
GOOD FOR sex dating
SUPPORT RATE 3.9 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 3.4 of 5
BeNaughty
9.6
/10
BeNaughty
GOOD FOR casual dating
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.8 of 5
XMatch
9.6
/10
XMatch
GOOD FOR singles in search of sex dating
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.7 of 5
Collarspace
9.6
/10
Collarspace
GOOD FOR BDSM community
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.7 of 5
Fetlife
9.6
/10
Fetlife
GOOD FOR BDSM, Kink and Fetish community
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.8 of 5
BDSM.com
9.5
/10
BDSM.com
GOOD FOR BDSM community
SUPPORT RATE 3.5 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 3.5 of 5
GetItOn
9.3
/10
GetItOn
GOOD FOR hookups and flings
SUPPORT RATE 4.5 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.7 of 5
Mixxxer
9.4
/10
Mixxxer
GOOD FOR swingers looking for adherents
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.9 of 5
The Vanilla Umbrella
9.6
/10
The Vanilla Umbrella
GOOD FOR flirting and meeting partners
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.8 of 5
FriendFinder
9.8
/10
FriendFinder
GOOD FOR love, romance, and marriage
SUPPORT RATE 4.3 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.7 of 5
Whiplr
9.5
/10
Whiplr
GOOD FOR kinky community
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.8 of 5
Bondage.Com
9.9
/10
Bondage.Com
GOOD FOR bondage admirers
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.8 of 5
SexSearch Quality
9.6
/10
SexSearch Quality
GOOD FOR searching a sex partner
SUPPORT RATE 4.3 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.8 of 5
Naughtydate
9.6
/10
Naughtydate
GOOD FOR flirting and entertaining
SUPPORT RATE 4.5 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.6 of 5
Adult Friend Finder
9.2
/10
Adult Friend Finder
GOOD FOR one-night hookups
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.8 of 5
SwingerLifestyle
9.7
/10
SwingerLifestyle
GOOD FOR people who want to be a part of swingers' community
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.5 of 5
FriendFinder-X
9.9
/10
FriendFinder-X
GOOD FOR love, romance, and marriage
SUPPORT RATE 4.6 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.5 of 5
AmateurMatch
9.3
/10
AmateurMatch
GOOD FOR sex dating and having fun
SUPPORT RATE 4.2 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.5 of 5
Alt.com
9.5
/10
Alt.com
GOOD FOR BDSM fetish and bondage lovers
SUPPORT RATE 4.8 of 5
SUCCESS RATE 4.9 of 5

Best BDSM Sites sites

  1. Good for finding an Indonesian match IndonesianCupid
  2. Good for people who want to be a part of swingers' community SwingerLifestyle
  3. Good for those who are looking for a swinger experience Quiver
  4. Good for finding a perfect match and flirting Oasis Active
  5. Good for gay relationships Chappy
  6. Good for transgenders for making friends, finding a date or love KoreanCupid
  7. Good for finding people who share your interests Tagged
  8. Good for teenagers who want to communicate and make friends MyLOL
  9. Good for those who have partners but looking for love affairs MarriedSecret
  10. Good for meeting singles UpForIt
  11. Good for meeting like-minded singles Telegraph Dating
  12. Good for finding a farmer, rancher, cowboy, cowgirl or animal lover FarmersOnly
  13. Good for meeting new people, making friends, and finding love Lovoo

General characteristics of BDSM Dating

BDSM dating services offer singles an opportunity to explore their fantasies. They are the safest place to meet individuals with fetishes and kinks similar to yours.

BDSM dating has nothing to do with buying women flowers and taking them to restaurants. It entails whipping, using handcuffs, and blindfolds. You only need to get the perfect person to enable you to live out all your sexual fantasies.

Main features

  • Live videos
    Some BDSM dating sites allow customers to broadcast live recordings.
  • Communication
    There are options for sending either voice or video messages. You can also communicate via instant texting and long as your partner is online.
  • Viewers feature
    The function allows BDSM dating app users to see the people that check out their profiles.
  • Safety
    ll BDSM dating platforms have privacy policies. The safety of customers is guaranteed. The information shared on the sites can not be accessed by third parties. The messages that users exchange also remain private.

Support representatives are also there to ensure that customers that encounter problems get attended to on time.

Dating site operation

  • Registration
    Every new user must open an account on his/her preferred BDSM dating site. The activity entails entering details like username, email address, location, gender, and age. In cases where you need to connect your social media account like Facebook, you will not need to provide the registration details. The BDSM dating app will acquire them from your Facebook account. The application will not post anything on your page. So, you don’t have to worry about your friends knowing that you are looking for sexual partners on the web.
  • Creating a profile
    The BDSM dating site section allows customers to describe themselves and the people they want to meet. You can talk about your physical looks, hobbies, the age of the person you wish to date, etc. The section needs to be detailed enough if you are serious about finding compatible matches.
  • Searching for matches
    BDSM dating sites recommend suitable partners based on profile details. Users can also use an advanced searching option to get matches. You can search using filters like age, location, body type, etc.
  • Communication
    When you have found the person you like on the BDSM dating website, you can start communicating. Some websites allow sending winks to initiate a chat. Users can communicate using text, voice, or video services, depending on the site.
  • Blocking and reporting
    Each BDSM dating website has options for blocking and reporting malicious individuals. With just one button click, you can block or report anyone you don’t want to contact you. The websites ensure to analyze hostile members. If they are likely to harm other users, they will get banned from accessing the service. The best BDSM dating sites have excellent customer support representatives. They ensure all the platform users do not have a hard time.

Pros of BDSM Dating

BDSM dating has several advantages. Among them are:

  • Chances of getting a partner
    BDSM dating entails various, rare things. It is not the same as regular sex. Getting a perfect match is not easy. You can ask people you know to get intimate with you, but they might not suit you. Most individuals also fear discussing their sexual feelings and fantasies.
    BDSM dating sites offer you an opportunity to proclaim tour fetishes. Everyone on the websites has the same interests, thus improving the probability of finding the right date.
  • Convenience
    BDSM dating platforms provide users an opportunity to communicate with other individuals remotely before meeting face to face. If a person does not interest you, you can decide not to meet them. Also, BDSM sites have an extensive algorithm that matches people with the most compatible partners. When you have the right match, you will never have any problem talking about BDSM. You might even end up having the most incredible sex experience ever.
  • No money gets wasted.
    There are both paid and unpaid services. When using free BDSM dating platforms, you will never pay to connect with other individuals. So, even if the site does not suit you, you will not lose anything. You might waste your time if you join an unreliable platform, but it will help you know what to consider the next time you are searching for a good BDSM dating website.
  • Shy members can express themselves freely.
    If you find it hard to approach the people you like in person, online BDSM dating services got you. You can contact any individuals you want without the fear of getting turned down. Unlike offline dating, where you are unsure if the people you meet are interested in a relationship, they feature people looking for partners. Since you already have something in common, it will not be hard to express your feelings.
  • Cons of BDSM Dating

    BDSM dating platforms also have several disadvantages. The popular ones are:

    • Misjudgment
      Connecting with suitable partners via BDSM dating sites does not make users feel more connected, like when talking in person. You will never judge people’s body language, and neither will you understand their personality well.
    • Confused options
      BDSM dating services feature millions of members. The high number of people can be intimidating at times. If you do not plan well, you might end up with many options for different individuals. Meeting many people can leave you dissatisfied because you are not focusing on one thing.
    • Fake members
      No matter how strict BDSM dating sites are, there can be scammers or fake users. Sometimes it is not easy to detect them, and you can end up hooking up with them. These people might harm you or even steal from you. So, people have to be cautious when interacting with strangers.

    Tips for finding a successful match on BDSM Dating sites

    Everyone on BDSM dating sites is interested in a sexual partner, but that does not mean that anyone can suit you. Below is what you can do to get a suitable match.

    • Create a detailed profile
      The profile section is where people talk about who they are and what they want. You can talk about your physical looks, hobbies, what you don’t like, the age of the person you wish to date, etc. Those details are what the websites’ algorithms use to recommend compatible matches. The same information is what you will use to narrow down searches to the most suitable partners.
    • Use optimistic words
      Some words on BDSM dating sites can make your profile more noticeable. You can describe what makes you happy or paint an image of a fantastic day that you wish to have.
    • Marketing oneself
      Avoid reusing pictures that you have used on other online platforms. Whatever image you upload, ensure it can attract the people you wish to date. Also, do not share old photos or ones that do not show your face.
    • Consider individuals whose lifestyle matches yours.
      Bear in mind that you must be realistic and upfront when creating your BDSM dating site profile. The same thing applies when analyzing other BDSM singles. It doesn’t matter whether the site you are using recommends matches. You must be careful about the people you decide to contact.
      The person recommended by the BDSM dating site might match your interests, but his/her lifestyle does not. It could be due to his/her working hours or home duties. Connecting with such a person will be a waste of time.
    • Spare some time for your profile each day
      After creating your online BDSM dating profile, ensure to use it as often as you can. Anyone serious about finding a compatible partner will visit his/her account daily. You can check the recommended partners, go through other users’ profiles, respond to texts, and initiate communication with people you like. You do not have to spend too much time on the BDSM dating site. Five to ten minutes each day are enough.
    • Determine what you want
      Even if the people you meet on dating websites are attractive, there are certain things you must know about them before agreeing to meet. Determine what you want for the BDSM dating site. It can be hookups, long-term partners, or anything in between. You must also know how much time you will want to spend with the person you meet. Your matches should understand what you want to avoid disappointments when you start dating.

    Myths and misconceptions about BDSM Dating

    There are several myths related to BDSM dating. The most common ones include:

    • The sexual act causes pain
      Most bondage and fetish videos found on the internet make BDSM dating look like a painful act. Do not forget that it is up to you to choose what works for you. Some of its aspects can cause pain. If you are not ready for it, then you should not try it. Getting tickled slightly is also a form of BDSM. Don’t always expect to bleed whenever you engage in BDSM dating.
    • It is a fetish.
      Society regards BDSM as a strange and unnatural fetish, yet it is only an erotic act or kink. There are things used in the activity which can get taken to the fetish point. However, it does not imply that the entire sexual encounter is weird.
      BDSM dating never always entails having sex. That is enough to remove it from the fetish group. Masochism and dominance are what lead to the actual act.
    • Females must be submissive.
      BDSM dating involves two roles, submissive and dominant. They have nothing to do with a person’s gender since women can do what men do. Anyone engaging in BDSM relationships can take charge, and the roles may get interchanged. So, if you get tired of being dominant, you can switch to submissive.
      Do not assume that the submissive position implies that your feelings do not count. You can even be more powerful than the dominant individual because you are the one who has the final say. You can decide when to stop if you feel that things are going too far.
    • BDSM is violence against females
      The motto for BDSM dating is safety, sanity, and consensual. Do not forget that getting tied up or having your eyes covered is all about context. Such actions may not be right when put in other situations that disrespect females’ needs. However, it is wrong to believe that women get used during BDSM dating.
      People engaging in BDSM use safe words when things go wild. Those words act as breaks when the action gets out of hand. If BDSM dating happens without someone’s consent, then that will be abuse.
    • Emotionally disturbed individuals are the ones who love it.
      There are happy couples who love engaging in BDSM dating. Engaging in it helps in improving their sex life, and it also lowers anxiety.
      Some people also believe that the individuals that desire bondage and masochism got abused when they were young. Research has, however, proven that BDSM supporters are not from broken homes. There is nothing to prove that BDSM lovers are mentally disturbed individuals.

    Tips for successful BDSM Dating

    Below are some of the things that you can do to make BDSM dating succeed.

    Bear in mind that it is not about sex but sexuality.

    BDSM may be sexual and chats, even within strangers. It can be explicit and full of fantasy. However, that does not imply that you should go to bed, do the act or be submissive to every individual you meet.

    It means that you will be interacting with individuals whose fantasies, kinks, or fetishes define a section of who they are. So, people need to be sensitive when rejecting others, and they must not judge them. What they are into might not interest you, but there is nowhere that it says that you must do it.

    Remain anonymous

    If you meet a partner on BDSM dating apps, do not reveal your private details to him/her. The information includes your email address, actual name, location, and contact number. You can only show such information when you are comfortable with a person.

    Approach with caution.

    When approaching the person you like on the BDSM dating site, do not be rude. Approach him/her in a way that shows you read his/her profile. If the person does not respond, do not get angry. Also, do not keep sending texts to people who don’t want to reply. Disturbing people who don’t want you can make you get blocked and reported. Such action might lead to getting suspended from the BDSM dating app.

    Make your profile stand out.

    Carefully selected words can make you attract potential partners. Ensure to describe your qualities and what you want from your partner. It would help if you also add encouraging words and tell people how they can reach you. Do not write so many details about what you want from your partner. Sounding demanding can discourage people from approaching you.

    Watch how fast people want to meet you.

    If the matches you find on BDSM dating sites are pushing for a meeting, resist if you are not ready. If they are not willing to give you time, avoid them. The pressure is not right in a sexual relationship. It is what has killed most marriages these days. Besides that, the people who insist on meeting you before you know each other often have bad intentions.

    Do not meet in private locations.

    If you plan to meet your BDSM dating site partner in person for the first time, choose a public location. It can be a place like a restaurant where there are many people. Even if you plan to discuss sex, which needs a private area, the first date must always be in a public location. The two of you do not know each other, and neither do you know your partner’s intentions. Meeting in a public place will make it easier to get help from other people if something terrible happens.

    Conclusion

    BDSM dating sites feature individuals from any background. The probability of getting a compatible match is high when using reliable online platforms. Ensure to remain cautious when interacting with strangers since reputable dating services can have fake users or scammers. Ensure to check reviews before joining any BDSM dating sites. Services with many negative reviews are not worth joining. Those with positive comments can bring good outcomes. Also, consider paid websites because they tend to have serious users. Free BDSM dating platforms have many fake members.

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Josie
Josie
Josie
MS, RD & Writer
Josie holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Sociology, and she is a certified relationship coach. The young lady offers clients a warm and caring environment. She has dedicated her life to other people’s well-being since she understands what they go through. Throughout her career, she has acquired enough skills to build healthy relationships.
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